First D&C, second miscarriage
Yesterday was bad, but I don't think it became real until today.
My ultrasound was last Tuesday. I was excited to see my baby after weeks of waiting. I was supposed to be 8 weeks. Doctor said the baby measured at 5 weeks, he said it was a 30/70 chance this would be a viable pregnancy. But he wanted to schedule another ultrasound in a week to check. That ultrasound showed no change.
He scheduled me for a d&c since my body hasn't started the miscarriage on it's own.
Yesterday was a blur.
It didn't really hit me until this morning. The thought, "they took our baby out of me" just kept resonating over and over in my head.
Now I know it wasn't a viable pregnancy and that it's better it happened early, rather than later. But I still feel empty, numb, and that there is something wrong with me.
They say it's chromosomal abnormalities, that it's common, that it was nothing I did wrong. I can't help but wonder, will it happen again next time?
My husband is trying to be supportive, telling me it's ok and that everything will be ok. He says, be positive.
That only makes me feel more alone in this.
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