I just don't understand why?

Question

Why do men lie? Then try to turn it around on you like you're the one who did wrong? Husband lied to my face multiple times and our marrriage counselor's face as well. When I caught him in the lie I confronted him and he finally admitted. Then said i wasn't gonna tell you bcuz I knew you'd get mad. Like then why go behind my back, disrespect me, break my trust again if you knew I'd be pissed? Makes no sense. Our marriage has been on rocks for 9 months now. I'm getting to my breaking point. I cry a lot. Last night I stayed up and wrote 4 pages about how I felt. I even got a little drunk. But he just slept just fine. I don't understand. Do I deserve this? I don't get it. I'm lost. Confused. Broken. Etc. I don't know what to do anymore.

Answer

That's not because he's a man. That's because he's a jerk.

Answer

He's gaslighting you. It's a form of abuse. Stop going to counseling with him right now. Get away from him

Answer

I learned in my marriage that if you're fighting and one person is sleeping just fine they gave no remorse.

Answer

You know I have come  to realize that sometimes if your partner is not happy and has to lied, then what's the point of being together and not trusting each other and fighting. Life is short you can always find someone that values u and have a peace of mind.

Answer

Women lie too! It's the type of person they are, not their gender.

Answer

Life too short to be that miserable pick up the pieces learn from it and move on.

Answer

This is my EX to a T!! He would lie lie lie, and get caught and then turn it around on me and  say "see why I didn't tell you in the first place cuz look at how you are acting" ummmm I'm acting this way cuz you LIED!!! What your husband is lying about is non of my businesss but my ex lied about everything, and cheating was one of those things. So I ended up leaving after 13 years of marriage and half of that I was completely miserable, but I have been the happiest in my life ever since I left, and I didn't look back. Sometimes it takes a leap of faith to make a big change, but it will be worth it.  Oh and sorrry you are dealing with all this, good luck to you😘

Answer

1. They want to have their cake and eat it too 2. They hate getting in "trouble" 3. They try to lie as it is path of least resistance but most are terrible at it 4.They are able to compartmentalize a lot better than women, hence being able to fall asleep or function at work

Answer

Not all men lie

Answer

Have a serious conversation about how much honesty is important to you. Tell him you don't want him to be afraid to tell you anything and talk about how you guys can fix that. Being with a liar is basically a deal breaker if he won't change his ways. It makes you lose your trust which isn't easy to get back. And he shouldn't be doing things behind your back in the first place. For relationships to work, it takes two. Both of you have to care enough, both of you have to give as much effort as possible if either of you really want this. But just know when to draw the line and walk away. Some people just do not change or want to change. And you can't live your life with someone who doesn't love you as much as you love them.

I just don't understand why?

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