Anyone have depression?

My boyfriend says I need to get help. But I'm embarrassed to. I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I don't want the doctor to say I don't have it & I know I do. I've been dealing with it for about 6 months and it's terrible. It's so severe. I think suisidal thoughts. I cry over everything. I feel worthless. I over think things. I don't think I'm good enough. I hate myself. I can't keep it out of my head. My head is taken control of me & I can't stop it no matter how hard I try. 

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