baby blues

I'm 35 years old and down most days still at 6 weeks postpartum. Literally the only thing to consistently bring a smile to my face is staring at my beautiful boy. I don't think I had accepted the magnitude of all of the changes that would take place. My husband and I were very social, and continued to be throughout my pregnancy.   even without the drinking, I never felt like I lost myself. Now, I still can't drink, but I also have another tiny human who takes priority over everything. I cried the other day because I didn't have time for a shower. My stitches ripped in the first couple of weeks and I rarely have time for my Epsom baths. I think the delay in physical healing is making it even worse.  My husband tries to be supportive but he still drinks a lot and I don't trust him getting up in the middle of the night for feedings when he doesn't even wake to the crying. I still do all of the chores around the house and luckily, I'm a teacher and have the summer off. He's also not working during the day because he graduated in May and is looking for a full time job. But not helping nearly as much as I need.