I'm almost 36 weeks with di di twins, and I've been on hospital bedrest for the past week and will be here until well after they are born. I'm here because I couldn't walk or move independently anymore, and it was becoming too dangerous for me to be at home if I were alone. My husband had been helping me walk around the house, get in/out of bed, shower, restroom, etc. I became pretty much disabled after 28 weeks. I am 5'1 and was just over 100lbs pre-pregnancy, and the weight and overall hardship of a twin pregnancy had done me in, literally.

So during this entire pregnancy, it has been really hard for me to relate to anyone who has only had a singleton. If I ever told them of my hardships, they would try to equate my experience with theirs. So I just became a hermit and stopped updating anyone and sharing my experiences. The last time I updated friends (always privately/never on social media), they only comment on my changes body shape, and one even said her husband looked at my photo and called me a seahorse. Nothing positive or encouraging. They all knew I was on bedrest and couldn't move and could barely stand for the photo. I was humiliated because I was only sharing about my growing twins and looking for support from friends. 

They just don't get it and never will. I talked to my OB about it, and he said it's not even worth explaining to people about how hard a twin pregnancy is because they are just "normal people" who will never understand. It's a waste of time. That made me laugh and feel better. But I'm pretty sad and bitter still. 

I've had no one to relate my twin pregnancy experiences to, and all along  this pregnancy --especially because I've only had this twin pregnancy-- I secretly feel that those with a singleton only are experiencing a "half pregnancy" anyway. I can't even hear their complaints or how "hard" it is for them. I think this may make sense to other twin moms. 

Thanks for reading about my thoughts. Can anyone relate? I'm posting anonymously because I'm afraid of any backlash or criticism 😞.

Update: Thank you for all the understanding and compassionate comments. I really felt like you could understand me, and it was such a relief to hear from you and your stories as well. I don't have a twin support group anywhere near my area. The two moms I do know in real life with twins were first-time-moms as well. One didn't have any more children, and the other went on to have another set of twins. Their twins are all in university now, so they've had so many years experiencing life as "ftm of twins and only twins." The both know what I'm going through, and they feel the same way: singleton moms can't understand and never will. Life with twins-first and twins-only will always be different.

I also realize more deeply that twin pregnancies are not only different from singleton pregnancies, but "first-time-mother-twin" pregnancies are different from those pregnant with twins after having singletons. The perspectives are pretty different. I still do feel singleton pregnancies are "half-pregnancies" ;-) It's like the cow born with 3 horns looks around at all the 2-horned cows and thinks, "Goodness, who are these 2-horned weirdos?" It's just a different perspective. Joking aside, ftm of twins is an interesting place to be, albeit lonely and isolating.

I'm still in hospital on bedrest and expect to give birth this Friday.

Thank you again for the support since I was so afraid to reach out..