I secretly hate my man

I can not figure out how to make my self leave this man.. he doesn't work has t for 2 years., doesn't help around the house has hit me slept with other women internet cheated now he claims he's changed but when I came home early last night from work ( I'm a nightshift ER nurse) I had a terrible migraine and because my hair clip scratched his arm he wouldn't talk to me n told me I had to take the dog to go to the bathroom!! Me?? When I worked all night n you were doin ur usual video games n I told u I had a migraine from hell? This is an everyday thing he loves to do this crap to me don't get me wrong when he's sweet hes amazing but now I've gotten to where I completely dodge sex with him.. oh and he has ED as well so even that's no good n he can only do it doggystyle to get off.. for 3 years only doggystyle yeticannot leavd this dude even when I kicked him out I took him back .. he doesn't know this but I secretly hate him