How do I handle this situation?

Question

I recently gave birth to my daughter almost two months ago. I am a FTM and just like any mom I am fiercely protective of my baby girl. It's my parents first grandchild and of course they are over the moon and head over heels in love with her. 
The problem is my mom has been telling me to let her have the baby since she has been born. I am still breastfeeding and my mother acts like she has a right to go off and spend the day by herself with my brand new baby. 
I let my parents visit whenever they want, and my husband and I stop by their house and visit regularly. But this is not enough for my mother. 
I have several issues with leaving my baby with my parents. First off, the lack of hand washing. They don't wash their hands regularly (and my mom is a freaking nurse) they think a little purell is fine and they love touching her face and putting their hands in her mouth. I freaking hate it! 
I can't even say anything to them because according to them they are top notch parents because they raised 4 kids. 
The second issue I have is that they have 6 cats. Their house sap ways smells like cat pee and it grosses me out. I am allergic to cats and they don't care. The sad thing is they used to have a beautiful house and now it's just a giant cat house. So gross. 
Now that I'm going back to work my daughter is going to daycare. My mother just texted me that one day a week she is going to pick up my daughter from daycare and spend the day with her. 
I am kind of pissed. 
On one hand I don't want to deprive my parents of their granddaughter but I have to think of my daughters health first. 
I can only picture my parents falling asleep and waking to find one of their stupid fucking cats smothering my baby in her crib. 😩 
My parents also won't listen to me about laying her on her back to sleep and having no blankets in the crib. They are so damn old school and think because all of their kids lived they are super parents. (Their youngest is 15 so lots of things have changed since then). 
What should I say to my parents? They get butt hurt so easily.

Answer

Honestly let them get butt hurt. Your baby, your rules. Never be afraid to speak up when you don't like something that involves your child. Good luck 👍🏼🙂

Answer

Honestly I would just say tough love. She's your daughter and you get to raise her how you want. I get they're her grandparents but you're her parent and you have to do what you thinks best even if it hurts them. Good luck ! 🍀

Answer

I fucking hate it the whole I raised x children so I know what I'm doing argument. Just how stupid/arrogant are you? At this point I don't think you should've worried about offending them. If they offended that easily they are the ones at fault. Just tell her no. Her parenting methods are known to be unsafe and you don't want animals around your child. You're her mother, it's your job to keep her safe. It really sucks that your mother won't take the hint. When you think about it she's actually being a really bad mother to you at the moment.

Answer

I agree with everyone here, your baby, your rules! And I know here in Texas unless you're on some kind of pick up order, you cannot just walk into a daycare to pick up a child. So maybe talk to the director or owner and see if they have something like that in place so your mother can't just walk up and take the baby.

Good luck mama!

Answer

Your baby, your rules, your parenting, period. Your mom needs to understand her boundaries and you need to clearly set them. All your concerns are valid and reasonable and if she can't respect that then she most definitely wouldn't be spending any alone time with my baby if it were me. And she can only pick your child up from daycare if you give them permission to release her to your mother.

How do I handle this situation?

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