It's been 6 days since my ex left. He's been trying to come back and I don't allow it. I literally got all his things he left out them in a bag and out by the curb. I'm feeling really down bc at this point I'm so confused. He's hurt me tremendously in the past and I'm finally getting away. It's really hard and I feel really alone.

He still continues to tell me that I'm the cause of everything and that I make him so depressed. Then why is he still calling me telling me he loves me?

He's been selfish and only wants to go out and drink. He treats me badly and had become abusive. There's holes in walls in my home from him punching or throwing things. I had to walk away from this.

It's just so hard bc in my heart I still love his dumb ass. But I remember all the things he's said or done and I know who I loved wasn't a real person and that's what hurts the most.