I'll admit it, I never loved you. Not like anything but a big brother. You were hot, though, and when you asked me out, how could I say no?

You're the first person I ever actually went on a date with. You took me to your city and got me authentic Mexican food and then snuck me into a drive-in movie. I love Mexican food and drive-in movies, and you knew that. You did all of it because you knew I'd like it.

But you weren't the least but interested in the movie, were you? You're one of those guys who believes if you treat a girl, she owes you a treat back. And I would've treated you; I would have taken you on a second date in my city, shown you around, took you to my favorite restaurant and refused to let you pay, would've sat under the stars with you and maybe even kissed you a few thousand times.

But that's not what you had in mind.

The one thing I don't get is that I told you. I told you about my past, about what had happened to me. I told you everything and you told me you understood, that he deserved to rot for what he'd done to me.

So then why'd YOU do it to me, too? Did you think just because I'd let a boy in before and hadn't pressed charges and never told anyone that I would just lay there and enjoy when you did it?

You were such a nice guy, Jordan. You were like a brother to me, and certainly a best friend. Maybe I would have even learned to love you romantically after a few more dates. You were such a nice guy....

Until you took it a step too far.

I had high hopes for you, but y'know what? You taught me something: even if a guy seems genuinely nice and says all the right things, he can still only want you for the sex.