A bit of back story: I work in veterinary medicine. Two weeks ago on Friday, my cat had a blocked urethra. My husband and I paid to have the issue resolved but decided that if it was to happen again, we wouldn't be able to afford the 2000 dollar stay in the hospital for 3 nights, that MAY OR MAY NOT resolve the issue. Well, the next day, our cat was blocked again, and we had decided euthanasia was our option. I called my mom, very upset, to discuss my predicament. I NEVER ASKED MY MOM TO HELP PAY FOR THIS. My mom offered, and reassured me when I was hesitant. So off to the hospital he went. The next day (half way through his emergency stay) my mom calls me and tells me to bring him over when he gets out of the hospital. I explained to her that he can have absolutely NO stress, and being a cat I can't do that. He doesn't know her pets, the smells of her house etc. My mom got upset and hung up on me.

*my mom struggles with severe depression and anxiety, and is an alcoholic on top of it all*

She got extremely upset and told me she won't pay for his procedure, and that she didn't want to be my mom anymore.

So I called the hospital he was staying at, and they are willing to let me make payments.

BUT I haven't spoken to my mom since. During the day she will text me and tell me how much she misses and loves me. Then at night, when she's drinking, she tells me AND my sisters how terrible we are and how much she hates all of us, and "how did she get so unlucky to get three horrible kids"

I haven't spoken to my mom in 2-3 weeks now. I'm not ready to speak to my mom... but I can't have her verbally abusing my sisters, to get back at me. If I speak to her, I know she will significantly lessen her drinking.

I've agreed to meet with my mom for lunch on Sunday. I'm not mad that she bailed out on the 2000. I'm angry that she talked me into a treatment that I wasn't comfortable with, and I made an emotional decision. And that she keeps verbally abusing me, then pretending like we are fine.

I have no idea what to say to my mom at this lunch, or how we will be ok again. Please help me... 😔