For so many reasons. It wasn't as bad when I first met my husband 4 years ago. Perhaps I was naive. I was the type of woman who didn't even want kids. But in the mix of day to day life I met my hubby and fell in love and it didn't seem to matter he had 2 kids. He was married 2x before and had a son with each. He has majority custody because frankly the moms are deadbeats and barely get involved and don't pay child support. But it's more than that. It was actually easier when his sons were younger. I hate having to take care of someone else's kid while their mom does whatever she feels like with no regard for how it affects her child. My hubby and I decided to have a child and she is now 10 months old. I love this little girl so much. I can't even fathom how the boys moms don't make more effort to be involved. There is not a thing I would miss in my daughters life. This week I hate my oldest stepson. He's almost 15 but just started high school this year. He and I have had mixed feelings about each other since day 1 but whatever. Generally we don't always get along. We try but usually one of us has to suck it up and fake it better than the other. Anyway. His dad and I argue all the time about him and his "privileges". Dad made it clear he could use the computer at 12 pm once he was done helping clean up stuff from hurricane Irma. Well I get going, drop hubby off at work and get home ready to clean he's on the computer. I tell him to get off. We fight about it and he keeps saying I'm lying and he doesn't believe me that he can't use the computer. He tries calling dad. Doesn't answer. We argue more. He gets mad and wants to leave. I said no you aren't allowed to we have stuff to clean up ( we evacuated for the storm). He throws the biggest tantrum and says I'm being mean. He hides in his room calls the police and complains to them that I'm being mean and making him help out. 😠. By then the 9 year old is crying and I'm holding my daughter as we sit and wait for them to show up. I'm frustrated and crying. They show up and lecture him and say that I'm doing the best I can. I have literally never been in trouble in my life. They talk to him more and tell him to listen. I tell hubby and he's pissed at me for letting this happen?! I tell him what happened and he sends nasty text to my stepson saying he was out of line. So later after this police powwow and chat they leave saying I'm not in trouble and did nothing wrong. 😒🙄. Stepson comes and apologizes to me and I say sorry for yelling. Honestly I don't feel hubby really handled it well but like I can't do anything about it. It's frustrating and embarrassing. I'm sorry but I hate his kid for it. I hate that he thinks he can talk back and act like he doesn't have to help. I literally can't wait until he graduates high school, enlists in the army and leaves our house.

He didn't end using the computer that day because everything took longer to clean than expected. Plus I made him and his brother clean the whole yard debris (which was a lot) and lots of other chores around the house.

Maybe someday it will all get better. 🤔🤷🏼‍♀️🙄