depression please go away.

true story on eve. I got over 100+ likes on my story..I said I'm gonna fight. I wasn't suicidal no more. I was depressed but not as much as I thought I could be. the likes I wasn't digging for I'll add that I just feel as though I've let down those who've stated "this gives me hope" because I want you to keep this hope and treasure it forever. I'm unsure on how or why I've been extremely depressed. and it's like I can't fight it. I feel so weak! how fucking dare I . I worked so hard on being strong. I fight back these tears with a headache following behind. what's my problem lately. am I okay?? I don't know. I didn't realize but I felt this unknown feeling for months only last week it hit me hard . I was suicidal. now I wont/cant do anything so don't worry. I haven't planned or anything I'm safe. but I force the thought "they love me, they care" over "they don't, it's obvious ...I mean look at you". I've cried over 20 minutes straight, it's pathetic for me to but it happened. I haven't felt like this since I was 14. if it gets worse I'll get help, again. but I dont think it will. I'd like to think I'll get better.