But for my own sanity i keep it bottled up. Talking, describing what i went through only makes my mental state worse. PTSD isn't only for the military, and i really wish more people could see that. Daily life becomes a struggle sometimes because of the timiest triggers. I have irrational fears about my almost 4 year old finding out how she happened, or going through what i did at her age. The long term effects don't just go away.. it's a daily battle, taken one day at a time. Me too.