Husband Talking To Ex

This girl to me is technically an ex. He dated her the same time he dated me. Except our relationship was more intense, we had sex, ate dinner together, lived together, I cooked for him, cleaned, gave him massages after work, ect. This girl worked with us. Before they dated she saw I had a hickie and asked it was him. I blushed and said yes but dont tell anyone.

Then a couple weeks later I saw she was snapping him. Didnt think much of it, he never talked about dating other people. So I went on with my day. well one night I was laying next to him and noticed the questions they were throughing back and forth were sexual. That broke my heart. I couldnt watch him giggle and send sex texts

Ive been clinically dwpressed since I was a teen, so... that pushed me over the edge. So I ran out to the backyard at 1am with a knife and my phone. If I didnt it I wanted it to hurt more than my heart was hurting. but I called and called and called. I didnt want to kill myself. Finally a friend answered and calmed me and instructed me to leave the knife and go to bed and dont look at him. The next day I went to my therapist and we talked about my steps of getting over him.

I started getting over him! Went to the gym every day and went to work. He started tk realize I was moving on and my body was gettin more curves 😉. A month later we decided to go kayaking. I was trying to move out and I liked him less and less. But wait before that happened I noticed he talked to her less and in the text messages I could tell he was getting annoyed of the way she would talk about other guys flirting with her. Anyways the day we went Kayaking was the day I realized he chose me, be didnt know that yet. A week later I woke up read there text and woke him the hell up. I said, "This is it! Fuck this! You know I have been working on getting over you and then you started showing me that you liked me more. But you still text her this sic shit? You need to make up your mind tonight! Its her or me!" I sobbed. "I cant take this anymore." Finally after him being annoyed that I woke him so shakingly he said, "I have been over her for a while, Ive just been having fun with her like its a joke. I dont like her anymore. I will stop talking to her."

We were official that year as a couple October 13th, 2015. Yes I know he put me through so much shit why did I go back with him? Well because he is my Twin flame. If you know what it is youll understand. Anyways fast forward to yesterday. we rent a two bedroom together and have a 3 month old son named Parker. Couple months ago I finally trust him 100% and for the longest time I just trusted 95%. I decided now that I trust him completely that i would buy him a promise ring and suprise him at a dinner. Well being buzzed last night and lying in bed I couldnt hold it in. I told him Ive been planning for month and I wanted to tell him. He was suprised and was super happy to know I trusted him that much and that I would make the step for us.

This Morning while he was in the shower I was on my phone checking my blocked messages. and Then just this gut feeling was like lets check BF, "You want see anything weird so it wont hurt to look." WELL IT FUCKIN HURT. He and that bitch were messaging around the time I was pregnant. I jumped out of bed with heart ache and rage. I through the shower curtain open and calmy told him, "Just be honest with me, I wont leave you if you just be honest with me." all angry faced he asked what the hell I am talking about. I said, "There are messages from her blocked like you are hiding them from me." he acted like he was shocked like idk how those got there I havent talked to her. I fucken pointed the damn date out. last text was the day I went to the hospital! To give birth to our son! After fighting back and forth. He sat behind me (Im crying of course) and breastfeeding our little man, he raps his arm around me. "I promise its not what you think, she just wanted to know how you were doing when you were pregnant and asked about the baby." I asked how many times have yiu guys talked. He said, "Literally like 10 times, thats it and it was sexual at all. I knew you would be upset that she texted me in general. and I thought about it being better if you just didnt know, that it would be less anxiety. "

I told him I am going to trust what you say but you should understand you talked to a gurl that knew that I liked you but she still pursued you. and I hated her for that. I asked him in the beginning of our relationship not to talk to her because i was comfortable with it. He obviously didnt think what I said meant anything. well he apologized and said he wont talk to her ever again. I dont know if I can believe that now.

When he left for work this morning I guess we are even about lying because I told him, "I still trust you 100%" That was a lie. As soon as I saw those text from her trust dropped 10%. He told told me when he had his arms around me that I am the best thing that has ever happened to him. He is in love with me and loves me more the I know. That he doesnt like seeing me like this. I love him to death but this hurt my heart so much.

For now I am anonumously posting but if people have kind opinions and care then I will show my face. Thank You. Update: Those of you calling me dumb, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. You dont know my financial situation or did you even read that we have a child? Easier said then done.