I was over the moon to find out I was pregnant with my second child. My daughter is from my first marriage, she's about to be 6. That's a huge age gap that I really didn't want, so I knew I was lucky that me & my fiancé have been living together 4 years and were solid enough to have a child. It was the perfect time.

My fiancé expressed concerns of not being ready financially. My ex husband is about to go to jail for not paying child support so we do it on our own, and the thought of another child was scaring him a little.

At 8 weeks I found out I had a molar pregnancy. Extremely rare, but of course after everything I've been through it happens to me. I had to have a D&C.; Then got an infection from the surgery.

Honestly I've been on medicine and completely out of it since my surgery exactly 2 weeks ago. But now I'm back to myself and I'm just so sad.

Every time I look at my fiancé I think of the baby that could have been. I resent him for having doubts about it, even though he was there for me and my daughter the past 2 weeks. I'm extremely grateful for that and trust me I've been spoiling him.

The worst part is that they say I can't get pregnant again for 6-12 months. My daughter will be almost 7 by then. That's such a large gap.

It just all seemed so perfect and now I wish it never happened. I'm so devastated.