Dear Dad

When you divorced Samantha you dont realize how much pain you brought me. I was only 11 and I took on so much responsibility that I wasn't ready for. I took care of the kids for hours while u were at work. Watching 6 kids when your 11 and trying to learn how to cook is really hard. I did everything I could possibly do because you are in pain because she cheated on you with your best friend. I clean the house, I make dinner, I do laundry, I take care of 6 kids and still trying to take care of myself. I was only 11 and my emotions were pushed to the back of my head and kids came first. sometimes I would forget to eat because the kids always needed something. and now you tell me to be a child when I was basically mom for so long. you do not realize how hard I try to be a child. but everytime I try it's just too hard for me to handle. you dating dating my cousin's mom. I love my cousins dearly but I absolutely hate their mom Chealsea. You don't love her I can see it in your eyes. You are oblivious to the fact that I leave and go to my room every time she comes. home. you date her while still trying to get back with your ex wife. you did not realize that when you and Chelsea break breakup she will take my cousin's away from me and we won't be allowed to see them you do not realize. that will cause me so much pain you don't realize I feel like I am losing you. I feel depressed. and all I want to do is cry or scream but I know that I can't. I don't want you to know that I am losing myself piece by piece. I'm scared to tell you because you would get up and run. I'm scared as hell I'm tired I'm breaking and you don't even know....................

How do I handle this situation? I'm 13 and scared of all the stress I am trying to handle on my own. I dont want to tell anyone because I'm afraid of putting unnecessary stress of taking care of me when I know that the people I can trust with this with is dealing with their own stuff right now. I dont want them to worry about me😕