No symptoms

We've been TTC since August. Normally, I will have allllllll the pregnancy symptoms and can guarantee that my BFP is on its way. I've never really been the type to have ANY period symptoms, with the exception of feeling emotional. So in my heart I just knew I was pregnant, until AF shows up.

I know we haven't been trying long at all, but I started questioning if I was meant to be a mother. Two nights ago I asked God to send me a dream letting me know if one day, I would be pregnant. That same night I have a very vivid dream of me getting many BFP. I don't believe that was a coincident. I told myself it's time to stop doubting, and believe in God's timing.

This month has been different from all the rest. I've had no pregnancy nor period symptoms. AF is due tomorrow....y'all....

What if?!?!?!?!

Update:

I took a cheap pregnancy test from the Dollar Tree this morning. I got a BFN and thought to myself, well...maybe my hormone levels are just low and this test is just too cheap. I haven't had any period symptoms yet...no cramps, no bloating, no mood swings. So I honestly thought in a few days I would get my BFP. Until now. I just finished using the bathroom, and aunt flow came out of nowhere.

My emotions are everywhere at this point. One moment I'm crying, a second later I tell myself it will be okay, then I start feeling sorry for myself and cry again. I hate self pity, but here I am sobbing. I know I'm blessed. I know and trust in God's timing and plan. I may not be a mother, but I'm a wife, sister, daughter, and friend. Right now I can pour my heart into the roles that I do have. God is quickly giving me peace as I'm typing this. He is good no matter what. *bloom where you are planted*