Okay, yes this is anon and against the rules, but this is pretty personal so i didn’t feel comfortable posting this any other way.

So, about 4 years ago (I was 14), I was raped by this guy. He was 33 years old, and the reason I was there in the first place is because I was hanging out with a friend of mine (we will call him Tyler).

Tyler apparently knew this man, and would buy weed from him. Well he bought me alcohol that day and I got drunk and the 33 year old brought me inside and started taking my clothes off, and we had sex. I never told him to stop, I was so drunk. But I never once led on that I wanted to that night.

So 2 years ago I started dating this guy who is Tyler’s younger brother, and we have been together ever since. I told him about that night a couple of weeks ago (and i had never told anybody about it.) and he confronted his brother and asked him why he let it happen. I told my boyfriend it was no big deal, I had been pretty much over it for a while and I don’t blame his brother for letting it happen because he had been drinking too. And i didn’t want to cause any kind of argument between them. But he insisted on confronting him anyways... Well Tyler told him “she wasn’t raped, she was drunk and she used to be a hoe anyways so she didnt care” (his exact words apparently.) and it just made me sick when he said that. But I let it go and didn’t say anything to him about it.

Well, today they are having a family reunion Christmas get together thing, and I’m invited. Tyler will be there, and I really don’t want to go. Not after what he said about me. But my boyfriend is super pissed at me and said it will never work out if I don’t let everything go and move on. (Because his brother will always be going to any reunion or family function.)

I just need advice. 😣 I’m dreading having to go there and face him, due to already having social anxiety, let alone after the things he said about me. What would you do??