My sweet baby boy was born 12/13/17 at 6:49am. After a very long, exhausting, and painful delivery that didn't go at all according to my plans, it feels amazing to have him in my arms.

He was due on 12/9 and when he didn't come, I began getting frustrated. I had false labor for several days and it was awful getting my hopes up each time only for contractions to slow down or go away a few hours after they began. I had my prenatal appt on Monday and was 1cm dilated & 50% effaced. My midwife offered to do a membrane sweep to hopefully jumpstart things and I said YES PLEASE.

That night I couldn't sleep so around 1:30am I took a bath. At the end when my husband was helping me get out of the tub, I suddenly felt like I had peed myself. But because I was in the water I couldn't tell what was coming out of me. I called one of my midwives and she said to wait and see if contractions come, and if not to come to the office in the morning to get my fluids tested. About 20 mins later I felt strong contractions coming on. I got on my bed on my hands and knees for one of them, and suddenly a HUGE gush of fluid came out of me and completely soaked about a 2-foot area of the bed. I knew that was my water! After that contractions got closer and closer together, and with each one even more fluid came out. It was a mess! When contractions were about 4-5 mins apart, around 3:30am, we called my dad to come pick up the dog and headed for the hospital.

Once we got there, my pain was much worse. As soon as we got into triage I threw up in the toilet and all over the floor. They wanted a urine sample and I couldn't even calm down enough to sit down and pee. They tested the fluid I was leaking onto the bed and confirmed it was amniotic, then admitted me. I was about 3cm dilated at this point. I was initially trying for a drug-free birth so I got in the birthing tub to try and relax. It did help a bit with the pain but I couldn't quite get comfortable so I got out and sat on a birthing ball. At this point my good friend Dena arrived--she's a massage therapist and she came to do some labor massage for me to help me with my contractions. It was amazing! She did this trick with a pressure point on my back and every time I had a contraction she held pressure in that spot and it helped so much. If any other moms have the opportunity to have a massage therapist in the room when you're laboring I highly recommend it.

At about 8:30am they checked me again and I was only dilated to a 4. A lot less progress than I had been hoping for after more than 4 hours. I asked for IV pain meds which didn't help much with the pain but made me drowsy enough to nap for a while. They checked me every hour after that and by 2pm I was still stuck at 4cm! My midwife then recommended we start pitocin to get things moving along. I knew at that point my natural birth plan was going out the window, because I've heard how awful contractions can be with pitocin, and with my pain level already being so high, I asked for an epidural. The anesthesiologist came in and administered that first, then we started pitocin.

I actually LOVED the epidural. The only downside was not being able to move my legs and being confined to the bed. I had this vision in my head of having a really active labor experience, changing positions a lot, walking around, etc. It was frustrating not being able to move and needing so much help just to turn over in bed. That said, it worked wonders for my pain and allowed my body to relax enough to progress more quickly, so I don't regret it at all. I progressed about 1cm per hour until I was at an 8.

Unfortunately, at 8cm I got stuck again! AND the epidural started wearing off, first on my right side only. They gave me a boost but within a couple hours the whole thing had completely worn off. I could feel my legs and my pain was worse than ever. I threw up some more and was trembling uncontrollably. They brought another anesthesiologist to take a look at me, and he determined there was something wrong with the first epidural they gave me, so he offered to take it out and start over with another one. I said yes.

By now it was probably around 11pm. I felt a lot better and they upped my pitocin dose to get contractions going stronger and see if they could progress me any more. I did progress to a 9.5 and my cervix was 90% effaced, but I got stuck there AGAIN! It was so hard being so close and so far at the same time. A couple of hours went by and my cervix softened a bit more but never completely effaced, and never completely dilated. My midwife suggested I try pushing anyway just to see if baby would move down a little more. I pushed for a while but made very little progress. This went on for HOURS. They kept trying to roll me into different positions and sit me differently on the bed but nothing changed. They kept letting me try pushing and baby was moving a little, but not enough. C-Section was being discussed. While I fully advocate for any woman's choices about her own childbirth experience, that was an option I simply didn't want unless it was a real emergency. I was heartbroken, but more determined than ever to get this baby out, and soon.

My midwife said there was one more option we could try before surgery. She called in the OBGYN who assessed my status and said we could try using a vacuum to move the baby down a little more so I could push him out the rest of the way. I signed the consent form and we gave it a try.

IT WORKED! She got the baby past my pubic bone and I pushed as hard as I could. Things went really quickly after that. Within a couple of minutes he was crowning. I pushed with everything I had and he finally came out at 6:49am, which was almost 29 hours after my water had broken. It was the most amazing feeling in the world and I will never forget it!

Please welcome Graham Quincy Joiner, 8lbs 7oz, 21" long, and the absolute light of my life. ❤️❤️❤️

The lesson in all of this for me was to be flexible and not get hung up on any plans or visions. You just never know what's going to happen. I should add that my husband was amazing throughout the entire process. He never left my side and encouraged me to do whatever I felt was right for me and the baby. I am so lucky to have him as a partner!