i feel like i have no one right now so i guess i’ll rant here. my friends have stopped hanging out with me bc i can’t go out, my boyfriend left me last night & went to a girls house. he claims her “gay brother twists his hair” but i don’t believe him. he’s lied and cheated before in high school dont ask me why i took him back idk either. his hair was done but i don’t think he did it, he is constantly snapchatting the girl when i have asked him not to. i don’t converse with men damn sure don’t go to their house so why does he do it to me?

we have a baby due in 12 weeks, i have nothing prepared we were supposed to be moved into our apartment this month but now he wants to show his ass. calling me a stupid bitch, making my mom cry, has started partying again, etc. everything has been perfect up until now for 4 years i truly don’t know what i did to make him hate me so much. i’m in school so its hard for me to work, he tells me i wouldn’t be shit without him and i’m gonna go nowhere in life by being in cosmetology school. now he’s claiming the baby isn’t his 😴 which is why he’s only been to one doctors appt. he’s 100% the father and he knows it, probably just his guilty conscience.

i’m doing everything i can to stay strong for my little boy but it’s hard knowing i gave him a shitty father and he’ll grow up without a family. i’m not ready to be a single mother but i don’t want my son in a toxic environment & seeing me like this. i sure don’t want him being raised treating women like his dad. i’m so thankful for my baby he’s already made me a better person but sometimes i feel like i ruined my life at 20 years old. he’s the type that will never leave me alone even when we’re not together because he knows i can do better, but i also don’t want multiple 16 year old girls in & out of my childs life playing mommy so i know this is going to get real messy.

i let things slide just so i could have a family, but i realized i don’t want to live my life like this forever. i’m not happy & if it weren’t for my child i would have not stayed with him this long. so i’m gonna have to fight. how do you other single moms do this? what do i bring up in court? he’s also 20 and i have proof he slept with a 15 year old when we broke up a year ago, he sells drugs, has been to jail more than once, but he’s got a good stable job & i just live with my mom. not to mention... am i crazy or is him tweeting this sexualizing children??

no negative comments towards me please i know i shouldn’t have laid down with him in the first place, i just never thought he would switch up on me. if you’ve made it this far thanks for listening 💗