I’m 32 with a 5 month old and feel like I’ve let my whole life pass me by. I feel like I’ve settled for everything and never been truly happy. I’ve dealt with everything from domestic violence to being diagnosed with herpes at 23. I have been so much of a pleaser to the point where I’ve put myself in a huge hole that I don’t know how I’ll get out. I really want to just give up. I try and talk to my bf but I don’t think he understands how I feel. It’s so hard to talk to him or completely open up to anyone. I feel so horrible sitting here on NYE with just my baby. I want to be truly happy but I don’t even know what that is. I do so much for everyone else but no one does for me in the same or even small form of how I do. I’ve been trying to not cry all day but now I can’t stop. I feel absolutely horrible and no one knows why or would understand. Sorry if I’m rambling I just don’t know what to say or do anymore.