Truth is....

I'm a 27 year old grandma. I married a man 25 years older than me who has two grown boys. The oldest boy is now married with a nearly 4 month old baby girl. And the truth is....sometimes it hurts me to even hold her. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for nearly 8 months now with absolutely no luck. I love this little turkey with all my heart and am so excited to watch her grow and become her favorite mawmaw! But deep down I want a child so badly that sometimes I just want to cry from sadness when I see her....