Getting anxious about having 3

Just being honest here. I know children are a blessing, and I remember how soul crushed I was when I miscarried before our second child was born. Well, I guess I pondered what it would be like to have a third baby, but this baby was a happy surprise for me. A little less happy lately....I'm feeling down about this summer. I can't shake the feeling that it's going to "kinda suck." My 5 year old is going to want me to run around the backyard with her. She's going to want to go swimming. We aren't going on vacation this year. The one year old needs my constant watchful eye. I know I'm going to put the baby down for naps and try to give my other 2 the attention they need (and I want to); however, I'm going to want to bond with baby and sleep when baby sleeps. I do have a great support system, help will be available, but I'm just caught up in the overwhelm already. Not to be shallow, but I can see myself feeling bashful in shorts and tank tops since I'll still have my baby weight. I know that's ridiculous, but I'm going to spend my summer feeling like a tired whale. I'm just posting this to get this negativity off my chest. We'll have 3 beautiful children to raise. My husband and I are a good team. It will be real. I will need to grow far past my perception of what "should be" and shed my feelings of shame of not being enough for my kids. I promise them I'll do my best....that's all we can do.