so you guys know that me and my SO ended things. Wellll dont hate me but he came back and I caved. But today I cleaned from top to bottom, made breakfast before he left for work, I did hie lunch last night,and dinner was ready when he came home. He started ranting 30 minutes after eating dinner calling me incompetent. I am sorry to say that i broke a 2 year recovery plan and a promise to never cut. He just made me feel so worthless and like i was a waste of space. I just wanted the pain go away. I woke up to find him having sex with me. Yes you read correctly.. We had drinks and i was out for the count. I woke up to him plowing me from the side.

I feel dirty and used. i just I can't fudging do it anymore...