I Think I'm Hooked....

I was prescribed pain meds following a surgery, and I'm worried about how they're affecting me. One pill doesnt allieviate my pain the same way anymore; i find myself taking 2 or 3 just to feel some sort of relief and semblance, I notice when I forget a pill, I get incredibly irritable. In between refills, I'm horribly sick. I don't like this feeling of dependency that's been developing, but I don't know how to wean myself off. I've tried going cold turkey but I legit get suicidal feeling. I already previously suffer from anxiety and depression, and the pain pills made me feel euphoric, totally at ease again, in addition to the much welcome pain relief. But I know that's not what I'm supposed to be getting out of them; I dont feel normal without them, but I'm terrified to stay on them. I don't want to be on this stuff forever. And I've read horror stories about docs cutting their patients off, and those people turning to street drugs. I dont want to be another statistic. My doc thinks I'm being paranoid and reading too many news stories, doesn't seemed concerned. But I am concerned. Addiction runs in my family (alcohol though). I want off, but how do I deal with the physical and emotional side effects? I never knew a drug prescribed by a doctor could become life threatening.... I have lined up an appointment for suboxone treatment in a few days here. From the reading I've done, I've learned this is how some opiate users kick the habit, but I worry I'll be switching one drug for another? Is that really going to help me in the long run? Really, any advice would be helpful on how to handle all of this....My emotions are all over the place. Why can't I just will myself to stop? I can't get over how strong the side effects have been... Sorry, now I'm rambling.

Edit: thanks to all who have advised. No, I haven't tried to wean. I wasn't sure how to go about like how many to cut down by and for how long at a time, but you all have given me some better insight. Thank you.

Anon: I'm so sorry to hear of your sister's plight. I hope she has conquered her demons, and to anyone who has overcome this, I am in awe. I hope I can do the same. Your sister sounds like a fighter =)