Is it normal to expect your bridesmaids to cover all this stuff....?

I am the maid of honor in my friend’s wedding.

Tonight she casually mentioned that catering for her bridal shower is costing $700-something, and she’s dividing that cost among 6 people.

Which, apparently, includes me. So $120. For just the food for the shower.

She didn’t ask me .... she just kind of informed me. I didn’t know what to say, besides “oh”.

I don’t know if I have to also chip in for the bridal shower hall’s rental fee ....or anything else.

She wants a cash gift for the shower AND the wedding, and I’m of course expected to buy my own bridesmaid dress. Cost of the dress is TBD, but I’m hoping to keep it around $200 or less (the one we looked at was closer to $300!)

I know she thinks $200 is a normal wedding gift amount, plus some contribution towards her Honeyfund for the shower .... (I’m assuming $50 is reasonable for a shower gift).

We will be driving an hour each way to avoid paying for the hotel.

There are no kids allowed. Which I understand, but it means I’m also spending for a full day of baby-sitting....... which comes to around $100.

So that’s $670, that I know of so far.

Before hair and makeup. Before any other pre-wedding party costs she hasn’t told me about yet.

When she asked me to be the maid of honor, she said it would be super easy and she wasn’t going to expect me to do anything besides show up. Which sounded perfect to me.

She didn’t mention being financially on the hook for things like the bridal shower food. Should I have known that??

Is that a normal thing?

I didn’t do any of this shit for my wedding. We told our friends to wear whatever they liked and we paid for everything ourselves.

Literally, we asked nothing from anyone.

I can’t imagine even having that conversation with a friend of mine.

“You’ll be contributing towards the catering”....??

I really don’t want to spend all this money..... it feels like such extortion !

On the other hand, I don’t wanna cause a big problem by backing out of the maid of honor thing.

But I’m gonna be in for probably over $700 at the end of the day.

Is this normal?

Thoughts?