i hate my body so much 😔

I was a UK size 10 before having my daughter and now I'm a size 16. Nothing fits me and I struggle finding jeans ect and it just makes me so upset, I really hate my body right now. I was able to lose about 25lbs but over the past few months I've piled it all on again. I just eat and eat and eat until I feel sick then feel so guilty afterwards, what is wrong with me. I've done it before why can't I stick to it now 😔

Edit- I've been on birth control since October and around the same time came off an anxiety medication