How am I supposed to get through losing my baby?


I was 18 weeks along when I gave birth to Evelynn and she only lived for two hours. Today its been a week since her birth and I don’t see how I’m going to be able to live like this. The father and I aren’t together and haven’t been for months, I bought a house for me and Evelynn and was in the process of fixing it up. I still plan on living there once it’s finished but it’s hard to see the point in making anything look nice. It’s hard to see the point in doing anything. It was going to be just me and her for a few years until the right guy stumbled in my life... right now I don’t want a guy, but I want a family, but I don’t want just a family, I want Evelynn. I don’t know how to move on and this suffering is unbearable. I used to think everything happens for a reason but I don’t see the point in creating a precious life and then not giving her a chance to live at all, that’s not fair to her. And did no good for me either.