Baby fell off bed. Boyfriend making me feel like shit

The title sounds dramatic but it was a very crazy moment..

We have a queen size bed that’s only on a box spring, no frame or anything so it’s not even 2 feet off floor. That doesn’t mean the fall still didn’t hurt my baby ☹️

Ok so here’s what happened...

I placed my son in the middle of the bed high up where the pillows are (note: I only have 2) and my Bf was on his laptop doing his music that’s next to the bed. (Another note: he is ALWAYS on the Xbox or laptop and I have to get him to get off to help or watch the baby)

So I get up to take a dirty dish with trash on it out of the room and then I was going to come back and get him settled for a nap.

I come back to the room and he’s just seconds away from rolling off the bed!! I ran over and tried to catch him but it was too late and he bumped his head on daddy’s computer desk 😞😢😓😥

My Bf immediately starts yelling at me and saying such hurtful stuff and how I’m unfit for a parent and “wtf are we even doing. You’re crazy” “I don’t want to be with you. This isn’t going to work. You make me so crazy and I’m always mad” he starts bringing up old issues that we have taken care off already and continues on being hurtful and yelling while our son is crying. I kept telling him to stop yelling it’s making things worse for our baby.

Also he says “I can’t do ANYTHING. I can’t live my life because I have to be with you guys”

He leaves the room to go get high and hopefully calm down..

I feel terrible because I feel like it’s my fault. I should’ve never left the room.

Another side note..

I told my Bf yesterday that I’m leaving at 11 am to go shopping for baby clothes with my sister.

Today rolls along and I remind him twice what I’m doing but not even once does he offer to watch the baby.

I have to keep going back and forth to him and to what I’m doing, while he’s just sitting on his laptop.

Side note #12579

Every morning I have a routine of waking up and getting the room and house cleaned up real quick then I relax, play with baby and then get baby ready for his nap.

I set baby in his jumper but he was fussing after a while and I hate to keep him in there while he’s crying because I feel like I’m neglecting him AND dad is again.. right there.

It’s frustrating when he tells me all these things but he doesn’t realize that I try to make it easier for him by taking over the care for the baby but I also can’t do it alone completely. I’m not super Mom.. I’m still learning. (23 FTM he’s 24 FTD).

I also cook and clean and offer to cook him something so he can peacefully play his damn Xbox or do his music which is his passion (plans on being a producer - he’s been very passionate about this)

I know what his music means to him.. and I don’t want to take that away and that’s why I let him sit there at times and I watch baby but today that was the first thing he did. He didn’t even try to be with baby.

I had to sit him on his lap just so I can get myself breakfast (that he rudely calls my 10 square meals a day.. FYI I’m underweight -88- and BF and need to keep my weight up..)

This all sounds fucked up i know.. this literally just happened and I have to vent..

I know most ladies will say leave him but I want to make this work. It’s been great for weeks now, then this accident happened and now he hates me.

Baby has a bump on his head, not sure if I mentioned that.. it doesn’t seem to hurt him when I touch it. I think his dad freaking out and me being scared made him cry harder, also he’s 7 months..

sincerely,

Just another mom..

😔