How would you feel if your husband made the conscious decision to re enlist in the military even though you have a daughter and a baby boy on the way?

Question

Backstory, my husband was in the military since he was 18. He served his 6 year term and now is going to re enlist even though we had talked about him not going back. We have a 1 year old and a baby on the way. He would be deployed quickly and would miss my pregnancy and our sons birth. It hurts so bad but I know the military is all he knows. He was gone with my our daughter and it was so hard. It’s his life and I want him to do what he wants but I can’t help but feel upset. How would you feel? I hope I’m not being selfish

Answer

You’re right, it’s his life and his decision. But you also have a right to feel upset for him changing his mind when you both already discussed it and he clearly knows how you feel. And at the same time, it’s not JUST his life anymore. His life also includes you and your children, so he needs to think about how his actions are going to affect you all.

Answer

I’d only be upset if we didn’t discuss it at all. I would want him home but also understand he’s trying to support the family. It would be hard.

Answer

The military is a great career to be in, and he can retire before he’s 40. Your children will have access to free college education, and health care coverage will never be a worry. I’d be supportive, but I am in a marriage like that (husband got out of the army but is a contractor doing the same exact job now). He’s missing out on the first and half of the second trimester of my first pregnancy, but looking at the bigger picture makes me more than okay with it.

Answer

I agree. I would be upset if he didn’t discuss it at all but my husband is a military man as well so I understand where he is coming from too. It does suck.

Answer

my boyfriend is almost at the end of his first 6 years and has decided to re-enlist due to the bonus that is being offered, which will give me more time at home once our baby is born. I do get where you are upset that. it's not just you two anymore, theres kids involved. I'd seriously sit him down and explain why you feel the way you do, but make sure he knows that you understand why he wants to

Answer

My husband is in 10 years so far. It is who he is and all he has ever known and the military is a good place to raise a family. It is honorable for him to do that. even though it sucks

Answer

I'd be upset and also learn to deal with it. It's his choice but I could still be hurt about it. I feel that situation is too complex to only be feeling one thing.

How would you feel if your husband made the conscious decision to re enlist in the military even though you have a daughter and a baby boy on the way?

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