Ignored again 😔

So I invited my friends through facebook messenger (and one friend that hasn’t got facebook through sms) to an event happening yesterday. We are 10 friends in a group chat and I’ve sent a separate personal message to my best friend from kindergarten and that separate sms. From the 9 friends in the group chat, only 2 have answered. Both positively but they ended up having other plans with their families so i respected that of course. Another 2 girls are abroad for vacations so of course they wouldn’t answer. I was totally ignored by the other 5 girls in which my current best friend belongs to and as crazy as it sounds, the sms message I sent. Sent a personal message to my best friend and she said she couldn’t come (so If I let her like that she wouldn’t answer to me). My kindergarten friend had other plans as well so she couldn’t come. And those other girls just remained silent and rude.

I NEVER let a girl unanswered in the past. I always answer the same day and if not, the next day for sure. I can’t understand what that was for. Was it really necessary? Instead of them to be happy that an opportunity for them to go out is there, they preferred ignoring me and making me feel like total shit. I was about to quit and stay home but this event was something me and my sister were waiting for a month now. I could’t spoil it for her. I promised to myself to stop being that kind from now on. They really acted kind to me in the past and have managed to use me multiple times. I am not a toy, i am a human being with a heart, mind and emotions. Nobody has the right to control me or my life. I am talking like this because this is not the first time that this happens with me. When they organize something, everyone goes. When I do, I am low key snobbed and ignored and that is not fair. And believe me, my ideas are way more interesting than a typical cafe meeting or a boring cinema movie which I always force myself to go to just to make them happy. From now on I am not the person I used to be. I am even thinking of deleting my social media and have a nice and peaceful summer without any toxic heartless chemicals.