How to find the strength to leave??

So I don’t feel like going all into detail of my relationship. I know it’s not healthy and I know I need to leave. I have left before to just be stupid and come back. I have 3 boys and currently pregnant. I have no friends no family and no help. I have not been working because the cost of daycare and child care for my middle child I would spend more there than I would make at a full time job. When I was working I was the one whom paid for everything including his friend to live with us. I paid all of the bills as they got to save their money. I was in a car accident in November and my car was totaled leaving me with $847 once the auto loan was paid off. So I have no vehicle. My past is always thrown in my face so I am constantly reminded of my failures, always put down , always last etc. when I type that I think to myself “ it should be easy to walk away” but it’s not. I have nothing. I went to a homeless shelter before but I hated putting my older 2 boys through that. Can anyone help or even shared kind words??? I have been working on myself, working on depression, even working on the side so my spouse doesn’t have to pay all of the bills. Did I mention when I paid all of the bill it was after getting fired at 4 months pregnant?? So over 1 year ago to current I have spent all of my saving on bills food etc. I treated myself 1 thing. He doesn’t help with the baby at all. Ahhh what do I do. I feel stuck. I called local motels and they do not have any availability for myself and my kids. Homeless shelters are closed today.