TTC and failing

TTC since October. I have PCOS and have never had a normal cycle in my life. At 16, mum took me to the specialist and had been on the pill for 5 years (until October) to reduce the cysts and try to regulate a cycle. After stopping the pill, I ended up in agony and had ultrasounds and blood tests which didn’t show much except for the PCOS. Instead of having 4-6 follicles on my ovaries, I had 24 on my left and 18 on the right. I thought..... yea! Shouldn’t be to hard to conceive with that many follicles forming. But blood tests show that I have never and will never ovulate naturally. The follicles begin to form and never get released. My specialist decided to try provera to induce a period and double the normal dose of Letrozole. Provera worked but made me so itchy!!!! After that cycle with letrozole, I had the blood test and was so so hopeful. Then I got a phone call from the specialist.... the double dose hasn’t done anything.

So next plan.... try Prometrium instead of provera. So hopefully no itchiness! And now try triple the normal dose of Letrozole. I’m now on day 2 of 7 of prometrium. I’m petrified that such a high dose of Letrozole may send me into ovarian hyper stimulation. And then if this round doesn’t work, I believe next step is IVF.

And on top of that, I live 1200km away from my family and specialist. I’m feeling very overwhelmed and now stressed at the ifs and maybes as well as hopeful. Hopeful that one day, we will have a baby in our arms

Sorry ladies. Just needed a vent.