Bag mom

I literally want to hurt my baby. i don't understand how something so sweet an innocent can make a person want to pull every last hair out of their head. I love my baby so much but I just honestly hate being a mom right now and it makes me hate myself even more. I wanted to be a mom so badly and now i realize I can't do it. Of course I'm not going to shake my baby or anything like that but I still feel the urge to!! How could I think like that... what the heck is wrong with me. My baby deserves a better mother.