Alright I need advice before I lose it!!! My fiancé and I are getting married in January and so far planning the wedding has been a nightmare.

Last September my fiancé proposed in our yearly vacation to Minnesota. The week after we found out we were expecting! Now we talked several month back about starting a family because it some health issues I have we didn’t know if I could have kids. So we both decided to try and fast forward 6 months I found out I was pregnant. My family was thrilled to hear the news of the engagement and new baby on the way. My fiancé mom in the other hand through out the whole, “well what am I suppose to tell people? You should be married first. Are you going to go to the court house before the baby comes or what.”

We need this would possibly happen and we are fine having a baby before marriage given the situation I was in with my health, however we are not rushing to get married before he’s born. The “sin” is already done so why rush the wedding?

So we picked out date several months after our son would be here so he could take part of this special day. We went to my church(we are both Catholic) and met with father. He wasn’t willing to do our wedding any later than 2, and when I asked if we could say an Irish prayer he said we need to follow the scriptures in the handout he gave us. I asked if we could say our own vows and that too he said no too. He didn’t ask us many questions about how we met or anything about our relationship, we are suppose to be doing classes with a different father and we don’t get to see him again till a couple weeks before our wedding. After leaving I asked my fiancé how he felt about everything and he said I felt uncomfortable and it was kinda weird. I asked him if he would rather get married in the little ceremony barn at our venue and have family marry us. My fiancé said I think that would make me more comfortable and that way we can customize the wedding to our relationship. It would be more personable. And I agreed 110%.

I told my parents and they said well we prefer the church but it is your day and it’s going to be prefect either way!

I told him mom and explained our reasoning and she said I think you’re going to overboard with your wedding, just get married in the court house or do something small.

I told her you only get married once and this is everything we want! (

Little side details of our wedding. It’s a typical wedding you see now a days. We are spending about 15k and making it everything nick and I dreamed. Nothing over the top and nothing too simple. )

Fast forward a couple weeks. We asked a family member to be our officiant! He was thrilled, a couple days later my fiancé got this email....

First off my son was never a mistake because we had him out of wedlock. My doctor gave me a 20% chance of having a baby due to two ectopic pregnancy’s and losing my ovary and tube on my left side due to a rupture ectopic that almost killed me. We had a procedure that flushed me healthy tube so we could get pregnant.

I also as Jonathan if he was uncomfortable doing the ceremony and he said no he’s happy to do it and she’s making stuff up.

My parents offered to pay for my fiancé and my venue. And part of my dress. They have been so helpful with planning and helping find caterers and such.

His parents haven’t help us at all. They told us they wouldn’t be helping which is fine but then don’t tell us how our wedding should be.

His family member called me yesterday saying he doesn’t want to be the officiant anymore because it’s causing issues. His mom is being so rude and talking about me behind my back and she keeps bashing our wedding.

I want to email her and tell her this is our day, I should be enjoying planning it but I’m not due to her rude comments. I understand she wants us to get married in a church but that’s our choice and she even brought up a court house wedding that’s okay but having family marry us isn’t?

Any advice. I don’t want to be rude but I need to say something or I’m just going to have a miserable time planning something so important 😭