Is it a dealbreaker to have different views on cheating?

Question

My bf tells me from time to time that he gets why people cheat. We we’re watching divorce court and the guy who has cheated multiple times said he did it because she doesn’t give him head. My bf said “i see where he’s coming from” he says shit like that all the time and he’s cheated so much in the past. Not with me but on his ex’s (he bragged about it) I on the other hand will never ever see why people cheat. when he says stuff like that it makes me think he’ll find some whack ass reason to cheat on me. “Well you don’t give me enough attention!”, “we hadn’t had sex in 3 days so I got it from someone else!” Am I overreacting by being mad when he says he can see why people cheat?

Accepted Answer

He’s really shady. And odds are, if he’s cheated before and bragged about getting away with it he’s doing the same thing now 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

Run, girl. If he sees “no head” as a reason to cheat then run for the highest hill you can find.

Answer

Very shady. No thanks! Things like that are BIG differences of opinion, and a definite deal breaker. Find someone with the same morals as you.

Answer

Sounds like he’s guna cheat on you eventually

Answer

Nahh. I couldn’t do that. Besides, those are petty reasons to cheat. I’d understand if a man/woman’s wasn’t getting ANY attention , affection, love, cold shoulders, or abusive relationship that makes someone find love in new places. But for the reason stated above? Dumb as hell and so macho

Answer

I mean I can get why people cheat, do I think it’s okay? Absolutely not. I personally would never cheat but I can see why some people would cheat. The comments he says are definitely not acceptable. I think you’re actually not okay with his actual viewpoint on cheating because it’s different to understand why people would cheat then to actually be okay with cheating. It sounds like from his personal history that cheating isn’t a big deal for him which is a no in my book.

Answer

Dump him

Answer

How do you know he isn't bragging to someone else about cheating on you? I believe people can change, but he clearly he hasn't. He's still team cheat, so you should probably just leave him to his own devices.

Answer

Saying that he can see why those guys were cheating would be a huge red flag. Bragging about cheating on other girls would be the dealbreaker. I don't any interest in being in a relationship with someone who has clearly shown a major lack of respect for his previous SOs.

Answer

Don’t stay with him. When my husband and I were first dating, he told me he had cheated on all of his exes and he said it’s just because they weren’t satisfying him. He always told me he’d never cheat on me, and he hasn’t (believe me, I’d know, he always tells me things in the end even if they crush me), but he’s even told me he’s wanted to before and basically we’re getting a divorce now because he’s finally realized he’s not sexually monogamous because he sees sex as just sex and basically only hasn’t cheated on me because I told him that was my only deal breaker and he at least respects the marriage enough to wait until it’s over.

Is it a dealbreaker to have different views on cheating?

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