Hopefully this post doesn’t get too wordy.

So, infertility has been a struggle for me and my husband for two years. Through my struggle I became friends with another lady who had similar infertility struggles. In December I got pregnant, but then in January I lost the baby. I reached out to this friend to let her know what had happened, and that I would be a listening ear and would be there for her if (heaven forbid) something similar happened to her.

She completely dismissed me by saying there was no need, and she already had friends that promised to be there for her if that happened.

Okay...

I dropped it, chalking it up to her having a bad day or something.

Well, a few months later she got pregnant and I was nothing short of supportive. We started going out to lunches more often, and I was there for her. I can honestly say that I was so happy for her despite my own pain from my lost baby, and I made sure she knew that.

She also ended up having a miscarriage, and again I was there for her daily. I made her dinner, knowing she wouldn’t want to, and listened to her day after day.

The more we talked though, the more dismissive she became about my own loss. It was as if she was the only person to have gone through it and it was devastating and hurtful to me for my own pain to never be acknowledged by her while I was there every step of the way for her. She was posting on Facebook almost daily as well, sometimes saying things along the line of not having any support.

Maybe I shouldn’t have, but I stopped reaching out to her so frequently, especially when she started commenting on my own Facebook posts (that had nothing to do with miscarriages or infertility) and making it about her struggles with infertility and her miscarriage...again, as if I hadn’t been going through this as well.

(Almost finished, promise)

So anyways, recently I announced I was pregnant on Facebook, and there hasn’t been a peep from her. Not a like, not a comment, nothing (and she knew I wouldn’t be telling anyone but family before the 12 week mark, I had made that clear from the start of us becoming friends).

My question is, do I reach out to her? If I do what should I say? Or do I let her be and just consider the friendship over?

It just makes me so sad that I’ve been there for her time after time, for both good and bad, and she doesn’t seem to care about me one bit. I have no idea what I should do.