feeling alone?

I feel alone. Like it’s me against the world. All my friends seemed to have disappeared since I became pregnant. I feel like a totally different person, I’m constantly so sad and unsure and that’s making me a bitch to everyone around me. I’m terrified to be a mother and I feel like I will be horrible at it. I’ve never been a baby person and every time I’m around a baby after a few hours I want it away from me....what if I’m like that with my own baby? What if I’m not enough for it and we never form that bond. I love my child without a doubt but I feel like I’m gonna fail me, it, and its dad. We where dating for a very short time when we got pregnant and now I’m noticing a ton of little stuff I don’t like. Like that he wAstes all his money on weed and doesn’t save any like he said he would. There’s a bunch of other little things I just don’t wanna be a bitch and expose him. I feel empty on the inside and like id be better dead. I feel horrible saying that because it’s not just

My life I’d be ending. I love this baby more than anything and I’d never wanna hurt her but the pain is just so much to handle everyday. I haven’t been this depressed in years... can someone please tell me they’ve been through this and it’ll get better cause I feel like it won’t and need some reassurance