I’m having a hard time facing the truth

2 years ago we had our first daughter and I love her to pieces. I am still breastfeeding her.

We wanted to start TTC our second around her first birthday but I didn’t end up getting my first post partum period until she was 18 months. And then I found out it wasn’t actually a period, but a very early miscarriage.

Anyway, we’ve been trying for 6 months with no luck. It’s really taking a toll on me. I want so badly a second child, but I can’t bring myself to take breastfeeding away from my first when I don’t even know if that’s the issue.

We conceived our first so easily I guess I wasn’t prepared for this. The constant “when are you having another??? Your baby needs a sibling soon or they won’t be friends” is really getting to me and I’m finding it harder and harder to be happy for all my friends having their second children already and accidentally to boot. I always planned for mine to be so close. How dumb!

Anyway, is 6 months too soon to talk to my Obgyn or a fertility specialist? Will I not even be considered because I’m breastfeeding? My periods have been weird and spotty since returning and I can tell my hormones are out of whack. Im worried I won’t be able to ever have another. I’m trying to let this go but when I think I can, it brings me right back down