I've gotten better and its been a really long time since the assault. almost 4 years.

and I've done stuff since then. and I've mentally gotten over it.

but every time I go to do stuff with my boyfriend even though I'm mentally able to my body kinda isn't. like even though my brain is like "yeah lets do this!" my body kinda just tenses up and is like "sorry no entry for you"

how do I get through this?