He let me get sexually harassed because he was upset that I wouldn’t sleep with him

This is long but I gotta rant about it bc i don’t really have anyone else to tell 🤷🏻‍♀️

So I’ve known this guy since I was 14. I had a crush on him for the first few years that I knew him, but he only saw me as a friend so I was like “ouch, okay, cool.” And moved on. We were very close friends; to this day he still probably knows more about me than anyone else.

The only issue was, the most important thing to him has always been getting laid. Whenever he met a girl that was threatened by our relationship, he would completely cut me off to please her until they broke up. I was always hurt by this, but I loved him (platonically) so I always let him come back when he needed a friend to lean on.

When we were 17, he became more flirty and starting crossing friendly boundaries. One night we were spending the night at a mutual friend’s house and I had a horrible anxiety attack, and because I was feeling vulnerable, he took the opportunity to convince me to have sex with him. It’s been 3 years and I still don’t think I was 100% okay with it-i couldn’t really comprehend what was going on. Shortly after that, he started dating a new girl and we didn’t talk for a while.

One year and two girlfriends later, he wants to sleep together again and this time, he wants to try actually dating. A week after we start dating, my grandfather in another state grows very ill and I have to fly up there immediately to say goodbye and go to his funeral. I was out of state for 6 days and when I got back, he was cheating on me with my best friend. (Who other boys had dumped me for in the past. It stung)

After that, we didn’t talk for nearly two years, up until recently. Now, I’ve been in a new relationship for about a year. This man treats me like a queen, and I can honestly say that I’ve never been so in love and so happy in a relationship before.

So the old friend reaches out to me, and we begin to talk regularly. My boyfriend is okay with it as long as I feel comfortable and safe. My friend has a girlfriend, but when we start hanging out in person, he starts to get a little too handsy and flirty, and I remind him (harshly) that while he might be okay with cheating on his girlfriend, I’m not okay with that. I love my boyfriend and that isn’t what I’m here for. He apologizes and things are normal.

He invites me to a party, and I agree to go. We’re good friends and I trust him. Once we’re there, we start playing drinking games, and he keeps pressuring me to drink more and more. I figure he just wants me to let loose and have fun (I’m not a big partier) so I go with it. Once I’m sufficiently wasted, he takes an opportunity to grab my head and try to kiss me. I turn my head and pull away because even when I’m drunk, I STILL LOVE MY PARTNER AND CHEATING IS NEVER OKAY. 🙃

I can see in his eyes that he’s frustrated, but he doesn’t say anything. After that, he kind of avoids me for the rest of the night. Typically, this would have been fine, but at this point I was drunk off my ass and I didn’t know anyone else at the party.

There’s this one guy there who keeps getting handsy with me, so I start asking around for my friend, but he refuses to hang out with me so this other guy will go away. It gets the point where the guy is straight up grabbing my boobs and my ass, and my friend won’t come help me get away because he’s decided he’s going to find someone else to sleep with since I won’t do it.

I spent 6+ hours at the party before my friend would take me home being groped and grabbed and followed around by a stranger because my friend wouldn’t help me get away.