Warning **Trigger to some **

I think about how nonexistent I am.... how the army has damaged me after I got out, and over the years... I feel like no matter how much I pray for the ones I love I feel as if God has abandon me ; this the reason I think about not being here anymore ... I feel like when there are a few days better I take more steps back and everything gets worse again... I feel like I don’t have a purpose ... 🖤