Maybe a victim ??

What makes you a victim of domestic violence ? My abuser would always say that it’s not considered domestic violence because I fought back, he says it’s considered a fight. Is this true ? I need advice and help. How did you ladies leave ? Outside of the domestic abuse he’s just not good for me. He cheats on me, he start fights to leave the house, he hides the relationship or try to. he verbally abuses me. I’m so insecure. I hate myself. I wish I was prettier maybe I wouldn’t be going through this. Im so weak and I don’t know how to leave. I just feel so worthless and stupid. Sometimes I feel I’d just be better off dead. I wanna get out of this and make it so I won’t ever go back. Can someone please give me some guidance or advice. I seriously need it. I’m on the verge of a mental breakdown. We also share a child, anytime I did try to leave or keep him away he brings up the child. I don’t want him to not be involved in raising our child but I just wanna get away to get myself together. I don’t know what to do. Any advice is appreciated.