Going through divorce

I'm writing this post for any helpful advice on how to wisely go about this from experienced women. A little backstory, I've been married a little over 4 years now and my husband (currently) has abandoned me 5 times starting a month after we got married. That plus alot of other factors is why I fell out of love with him. So now it gets complicated because we have 2 kids together and I've already expressed my feelings and how I want a divorce and to just co parent. I want peace and to maintain a good relationship for our kids. He unfortunately feels differently and is very controlling trying to make me feel guilty and saying it will be a war. Using the kids to make me feel guilty for wanting a divorce. I can't stay just because we have kids. I'm miserable with him & just want out & on my own with shared custody. I feel he may use our kids to hurt me too. He's not a good person. He puts our kids safety & health at risk. He has no common sense & is dangerously dumb. Will never strap them in the carseats properly. Never washes their fruits & vegetables. Left the door open where our 2 year old ran out the door & almost into traffic. There's currently a rabid raccoon that attacked our next door neighbors dog last night & hasn't been caught yet. I told him to keep our son out of the backyard until it's caught, but he doesn't care & says he's not afraid of it. Like that's not the F*ing point!! This is about our sons safety & he should care! So anyway, this is what I'm dealing with & I've been wanting a divorce for a long time. Any good advice on how I go about this or is he just going to make it hell for me?? I just want a civil divorce and peace 😭