Okay say you, your partner, and a group of your friends (not necessarily friends with your partner, but friendly) have plans to go to a Halloween party. You’ve been planning your costumes and getting everything ready, and you’re pretty excited.

It’s the biggest party of the year and I’ve ALWAYS wanted to go, but in high school I wasn’t allowed (college party; I grew up in a college town), my freshman year of college I found out I was pregnant (LITERALLY the day before the party) so I went for a little bit but couldn’t drink obviously. Then my sophomore year, I had a 4 month old and didn’t want to leave him with my mom over night yet, so I skipped. No big deal. Now I’m a junior and my mom is planning to keep my 1 year old. I’ve been ready for this for a while and am very excited. ( I also haven’t had a night out since my son was born, I’m not complaining about that but no one will make me feel guilty for taking one night off when I know my son is safe)

Here’s the issue: say your partner hurts their thumb at work (pretty damn bad), busted finger nail, torn cuticles, finger nail will more than likely fall off... you get it. This was yesterday, the party is tomorrow. I’m scared he won’t want to go now because of his finger. But I don’t think he’ll want me to go without him and I won’t have a DD if I do go with just my friends. Is it selfish to still go even if he doesn’t? I won’t be mad if he doesn’t want to go, but I still want to. I just don’t know if I’m being selfish