Pregnant and not supposed to be

Y’all I’m terrified. I’ve always wanted kids but not like this. I’m a stereotypical college grad... student debt (lots of it), struggle finding good job, and back living at home. None of that means I’m a failure but I just found out I’m one month pregnant and the father is someone my family cannot stand.

I didn’t believe the signs because I was in love but my family and friends were right all along (whoa shocker.. a person in love not believing facts laid out in front of them because of rose colored glasses and then heartbroken they were wrong?! I’m aware (now) how much of a broken record I am. He swore he wasn’t still in a relationship with his girlfriend. I had nothing at the time to believe otherwise. I was warned by family and friends who would say, “something doesn’t add up....” but I always dismissed it. They were right. I found out I’m basically the mistress.

How am I going to raise this kid? I’m terrified. I would love it and my family would love it but they’re going to lose love for me, I’m sure of it. I’m so broke it’s ridiculous... what am I supposed to do? And what about his family? They’re super involved in their other grandchildren’s lives and would love this kid too but hate me. I should have seen the signs. Now I’m going to be the hated “other woman.” I feel like my life is over. I brought it on myself though.. I shouldn’t have been so damn blind.