Girls I really need your help,

I’ve always worried about having sex because in my head I think it’s going to hurt a lot

So I first had sex 2 years ago and it was painful every time and I would lay there just wishing for it to be over, I’ve been in other relationships since but never have sex because I’m always worried that it’s going to hurt like it has before

I tried to have sex again the other day and I’m not even sure he got the full tip in before it started to hurt, he has an average size penis, when it really started to hurt I still tried to put through it because I just want to be able to do it but I just couldn’t and we had to stop

He has big fingers and I can deal with that so why can’t I handle having sex with him?

It really is embarrassing that I can’t have sex, I feel like I’ve really tried to let go and enjoy it but I just can’t? Is it all in my head or could it be something wrong with my body?