I met my current fiancé about 2 years ago. I became pregnant with his child just 3-4 short months after meeting him. I met him when I was 20, and had our baby at 21. I believe that we conceived a baby too early in our relationship, we didn’t truly know each other. Our baby is now 8 months. And I feel trapped in this relationship. I know leaving him and raising our baby from different house holds will be hard.., But I think staying in this miserable relationship and fighting constantly would be way harder.

I’m not sure if I stay with him because I want to and want to make I work, or if I stay because I feel like he might keep my baby from me in court. Every time we fight, and I try to leave nicely, and he tells me to go, but he also adds that I better be ready to get nasty in court cause he’s gonna “ruin my life, my parents life, and fight for full rights of the baby”. And then that makes me not even want to leave, cause he has the money to get a good lawyer, he has some proof that might actually help his side and make my chances of keeping her worse.

I’m truly not happy, he has major trust issues, and is just a straight up fucking asshole. If I knew that he wouldn’t go to court and try to fuck me, then I would leave. I’m always trying to leave nicely, and I’ve never once said I would keep her from him. I try to set down and talk to him about how we could share her, and not either of us have to pay child support. But he just can’t fucking agree to anything. He wants me to sign my rights over, and I’m at the point where, I just might, for my own sanity. Not really, I don’t want to sign my rights over. In all honesty, I want him to sign his rights over, and forget about us. He had a child when he was 16, and gave up his rights to that one and doesn’t even bother to think about his 1st child. So why can’t he do it now? why does he have to try to ruin my life. I literally just want to pack what I need, and take her to another country with me, and run away.

I’m only here for her, there’s honestly no love left in me to try to even work it out with him. He has said so many things to destroy my confident level. And then he wonders why I mope around the house, feeling fat, or ugly, or why I don’t want to have sex with him.. because he says fucked up things that make me miserable, and depressed. My mom and dad said I’m a totally different person now, and that i just look and act beaten down. And I don’t disagree with them. I use to have so much confidence and wouldn’t care what one no one thought, now I can’t even walk through the grocery store without feeling everyone’s eyes burn thru me, and are judging. I can’t live this way anymore. If I stay, then I’ll always remain miserable, and unhappy, and if I try to leave, he’s gonna take my baby and destroy my life. I want to fall asleep and never wake up