The effects of strain and loss on relationships

My fiancé and I have been together for a little over 16 months. In the first 2 months he cheated on me with his ex in my bed. Although I was extremely hurt and it took a while for me to get over it, we worked through it and he hasn’t cheated since. Our relationship took a hit though. I found out I was pregnant at 8 weeks in December of 2017 but only being 3 months after the cheating incident, I was a little less than excited at first. I definitely came around though 😍. I mean how can you not be so happy and so in love after finding out your pregnant? A month later in January my step father passed away so D and myself went to my moms to console her and be with her during that difficult time. That same day I miscarried. 😭😭😭 That was the biggest strain on our relationship. We were both in such unbearable pain and we did our best to console each other and to help each other through it but couldn’t due to the fact of coping differently. I wanted to lay in the bed and die while he wanted to try again pretty quickly. Needless to say, I was nowhere near ready to try again. Our sex life completely vanished and we began to fight daily. During this time in our relationship, many feelings of hurt and betrayal (from the cheating in the beginning) arose and on top of the MC. I got to where I didn’t want to even try anymore. I still loved him but it seemed like all he cared about anymore was sex while sex was the farthest thing from my mind. The more we fought the less I ever wanted to have sex again because that was the main thing we fought about. Last month on the 29th of October, my father passed away. Keep in mind that I am the BIGGEST daddy’s girl on the planet. Losing him has changed everything. D stood by me in my dads hospital room through every conversation with the doctors, through every difficult decision I had to make. He was beside me when I took my father off of life support and he was beside through every step of planning the funeral. He held my hand while they buried my father. Every “little” thing that I thought was missing in my relationship has been there the whole time. My sex drive is back (though not nearly as high as his) and I’ve never loved him more than I do now. However, there are times I feel like all I want to do is curl up in a ball in my bathroom floor and cry. I guess it’s just that I’m still grieving. Please feel free to comment with any thoughts and/or advice. Thanks so much for reading this and have a blessed day ♥️