It going down hill fast...

It's like I went from ttc to birth control in 0.2 seconds!! 😭😭 and my husband doesn't know!! 😭🤢😢 I feel like we're falling apart. I feel like his time is always need else where. Like yesterday I woke up in a bad mood (do to the night before) and so I left to run errands that night when he got home he says he's not going hunting he's going to spend time with me. Y'all not even 5 mins later he says the neighbor has a new scope for his gun and he was going to shoot it 😞 I feel like he only makes time to fuck.... We're not ready for a family 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I can't talk to him bc he turns it into an awkward silence and doesn't say shit. I really want a family but I can't right now and I can't tell him. Should I keep hidden the pills or come forward?